Men with Babies
by FictionInReality
Summary: He’d always heard that women were into guys with kids. Ryan and Sophie.


_Disclaimer: I own nothing but my ladybug rain boots._

He'd always heard that women were into guys with kids. It's something about the nurturing, or the love, or the openness of emotions…

Ryan still didn't appreciate the attention.

Being the son who lived close to home, Ryan was often recruited for family dinners and babysitting duty on weekends.

Sure, Seth came home on holidays and vacations, spent time with the parents, played video games with Ryan, and colored with Sophie. But he wasn't Sophie's personal chauffer and babysitter.

Still, Ryan didn't mind.

He loved his sister and was happiest when he was with her. His apartment was decorated with a few photos from high school and many family portraits and pictures of him and his siblings throughout the years.

Girls who came to his apartment fawned over pictures of Ryan and Seth (_That's your **brother**? You guys are soooo cute!_) and nearly died squealing when they saw pictures of Ryan playing with Sophie.

What was it with women and men with babies?

Had Sophie ever heard him wondering that, she would've hit him. She was six now, a big girl (nearly a woman, Ryan often joked), and she wasn't a baby.

She wouldn't listen when Kirsten told her she'd always be her baby.

He'd pondered women's obsession when shopping with Sophie at the supermarket, playing with her at the park, or picking her up from school.

Single soccer moms were quick to hit on 25-year-old (what they thought to be) single dads.

He was flattered, of course, but he was still on-and-off with Taylor and, much as he hated to admit it, she had him under her thumb. And Sophie loved Taylor, so she did what she could to frighten the women away. (Ryan was sure it was Seth who had taught her to cling to his leg, point at the woman and scream "Demon! DEMON!")

He thought he'd be safe bringing his sister to visit their father at his college lecture; after all, Ryan was too old for the college girls, and most of them were drooling over frat guys.

The plan was that Ryan would bring Sophie at 12:50 that Tuesday morning, when Sandy's Lawmaking and Politics class let out. The visit was to be a surprise for Sandy's birthday, and Sophie and Ryan planned to take him out for lunch.

Naturally, Ryan being Ryan, he had picked Sophie up from his parents' house at 11:30 and had arrived at the college twenty minutes early.

Sophie, of course, sighed,

"If you were Seth, we wouldn't be early."

Ryan threw her a sideways glance,

"If I was Seth, we'd probably get here on the wrong day," Ryan peered through the small window into the large lecture hall, "So what do you want to do, kid? You want to hang out out here or go sit in on daddy's lecture until he's done?"

Sophie shrugged,

"Don't care."

Both were quiet for a moment until Ryan admitted hurriedly,

"I'm kinda curious to see how he is as a teacher. You?"

Sophie's blue eyes met Ryan's,

"I'm more curious than George."

Sophie quickly latched onto her brother's hand as he led her noiselessly through the back door and to two seats in the third-to-last row.

Sandy, so immersed in his lecture, didn't see them come in.

The four giggling twenty-year-olds in the row ahead of him seemed to notice, though.

Ryan ignored their sideways glances and girlish whispers as he took Sophie's coat and placed it in the seat next to his and focused on Sandy's lecturing.

The girls' breath hitched in their throats when Ryan ruffled Sophie's hair affectionately.

Their 'aw's were no longer disguised by whispers when Sophie rested her head on Ryan's arm.

Ryan was floored that Sandy hadn't heard their squeals when he bent down and kissed the little girl on the forehead.

The girls whispered giddily and shot him pseudo-seductive glances as he, with true Newport breeding, ignored them. Within a few minutes, he felt a tiny elbow nudge his and he looked down to find a tic-tac-toe board drawn messily on a sheet of paper Sophie had pulled from her miniature backpack.

_'Bored?' _he mouthed.

"I don't know what he's talking about," Sophie whispered in response.

"Oh? I thought you knew everything, Sophie Rose?"

"I'm in first grade. Give me a break," she tapped the paper, "Xes or Oes?"

They proceeded to play three games in which Sophie was declared the winner. Ryan only let her win once, but to be beaten by your six-year-old sister at anything was embarrassing, so it was imperative that he never tell anyone.

"You know," a redhead from the row ahead of them whispered, "I always start in the top right corner."

Sophie rolled her eyes, trained down at the floor, and Ryan gave a polite, non-committal thank-you nod.

"You know who taught me that?" the girl continued. Sophie grinned deviously,

"The Teletubbies?"

Ryan snorted and the girl blinked stupidly, though she continued,

"No. My daddy taught me that," her gaze turned to Ryan, but continued to talk to Sophie, "What does _your_ daddy teach you?"

Sophie, having gone through this many times before, recognized the unbridled idiocy in the girl's voice and understood that the girl believed Ryan was her father.

"My daddy showed me a picture of a shirt that looks like the one you're wearing and told me that girls who wear those shirts are desperate."

Ryan shot his sister a warning glance, unsuccessfully trying to hide his grin, and Sophie smiled angelically.

Still, the redhead seemed undeterred.

"Maybe I am," she winked at Ryan and he felt his cheeks fill with heat,

"Yeah, ok…"

He was saved from another awkward silence by Sandy's voice reverberating through the hall,

"Excuse me, in the back? I'd appreciate your attention as there's a test next week."

The girl blew a wholly unseductive kiss at Ryan and turned back around, responding,

"Sorry, Professor Cohen."

"It's alright," Sandy nodded. He peered past the girl and his eyes found his son and daughter. His smile registered surprise and joy as Ryan waved quietly and mouthed 'Help.'

Sandy grinned and quickly wrapped up his lecture, packing up his things as he waited for his children to come to him.

"What are you two doing here?" he greeted, hugging Ryan and lifting Sophie, kissing her cheek hello.

"We're taking you out to lunch for your birthday, daddy!"

"Well, I am a spoiled man," Sandy laughed.

Ryan began to respond, but was interrupted by an unsettlingly familiar voice,

"Oh my gosh! You know Professor Cohen?"

"These are my kids," Sandy responded, "This is my daughter Sophie and my son Ryan."

"Your _son _and your _daughter_? Shut up! I totally thought she was his kid!"

"Well, you were wrong, weren't you?" Sophie spat, to which Sandy narrowed his eyes at her,

"Sophie Rose!"

Once again, the girl ignored Sophie and continued talking,

"So, what's it like to have the great Sandy Cohen as a father?"

Ryan sighed and, cursing his manners, felt the need to answer her,

"It's like having this class for free. All the time."

The girl laughed a little too loudly and shifted her body weight,

"Ok, well, call me sometime," she placed a piece of paper into his pocket, "Who knows, I might be your daughter-in-law someday."

As she skipped back to her giggling friends (Ryan wondered how they hadn't passed out from lack of oxygen yet), he exhaled,

"Don't count on it."

"Long day?" Sandy asked.

"Do you get hit on when you take Sophie places?"

"All the time. It's why Kirsten doesn't make me do the grocery shopping anymore."

"Is there any way to stop it?"

"Just accept it and move on with your life. And sometimes, if you really want, you can get people to give her free stuff."

"Sandy!"

"What? Can I help it that I have a cute daughter? If they offer her a free piece of cake, who am I to turn it down?"

"Does Kirsten know you do this?"

Sophie shook her head,

"No, it's daddy and my secret… Don't tell her either! I like getting free cake!"

"Alright, alright," Ryan took his sister from his father and they made their way to a little Italian restaurant just off-campus.

As they sat down, the waitress, their twenty-something waitress leaned over and smiled cheerily at Sophie,

"What a cutie!"

She stood up and brushed her hand over Ryan's shoulder,

"Oops," she fluttered her eyes, "Sorry."

She left and Sandy and Sophie collapsed into giggles against the white tablecloth.

"Keep, laughing, you two, but Sandy, she thought _I _was Sophie's father. Which would make you her grandfather. And Sophie?"

"Yeah?"

"You'd better get that pout ready, because I only brought enough money for cake for two."


End file.
